Tamworth Council: Nothing To Say, But Plenty To Film.

Tamworth Council has today unveiled a four-minute video that, according to residents, manages to say less than a councillor at question time, but with better lighting.

Complete with soaring drone shots, stock-standard piano music, and corporate buzzwords delivered like gospel, the video has been described as a “multi-thousand-dollar PowerPoint with moving pictures.”

“I watched the whole thing and still have no idea what it was about,” said local man Baz.

“I think it was supposed to be about Tamworth’s future? Or maybe selling me a new super fund? Either way, I didn’t get it.”

Despite being pitched as a message of progress, the video contained roughly zero concrete information, no budget details, no service plans, not even a passing mention of when the potholes might get fixed.

“They said ‘community’ about 14 times,” said Leanne from West Tamworth.

“But it was the kind of ‘community’ that means consultants in Sydney got paid to write a script, not the kind where they actually asked anyone here what we needed.”

The true highlight was the drone footage — gliding majestically over roundabouts, fields, and buildings council won’t let anyone redevelop. For many locals, it was the first time they’d seen Tamworth from above, and the last time they’d see their rates before they disappeared into production costs.

In the end, the only real message of the video was clear: if you film Tamworth from high enough, you can’t see the potholes, the council debt, or the ratepayers rolling their eyes. Turns out the best strategy for saying nothing is just saying it with a drone.

This article is satirical. It is not representative of real events.